They say the key to being a writer is figuring out who you are, finding your voice. I’ve come to a kind of epiphany about life: you never can find yourself because you’re changing all the time. Every minute, every day, every experience is shaping your reality and your person. Finding your writing voice is the same, each piece you write allows you to grow. At least that’s what I see in my blogging experiment.
I like to think I have a unique voice, that I am funny and charming in my blog posts. I hope my readers perceive me that way. That’s why I’m so excited and nervous about participating in NaBloPoMo this month. In order to post something every day I need to write something every day. In order to write something every day, I need to have interesting things to write about. In order to have interesting things to write about I need to be interesting and I worry that I am not interesting. But this vulnerability is what makes NaBloPoMo simultaneously thrilling and crippling.
So I decided to examine my life, what have I learned in my 24 years that might be of interest and might be mistaken for life lessons?
- Accept responsibility – it has taken me 24 years to really appreciate what it means to make a mistake AND accept that I did something wrong, but I finally discovered that by taking responsibility for my actions, I learn more about how to act in the future.
- Look at things from another perspective – I have been known to be impatient, my schedule and my wants and needs often were the only things on my radar. By taking a step back and seeing the situation from another point of view I can let go of less important wants while making my needs known.
- Listen – it turns out that listening is not just waiting for the other person to stop talking so I can say what I’ve been thinking about the whole time they’ve been speaking. Listening is a learned skill in which you don’t just hear what is being said, you also comprehend and process it.
- Question everything – gullibility is possibly one of my more endearing traits but it is blind acceptance of information. Ignorance is not bliss: always check facts and research topics before believing them.
- Every moment is an opportunity – carpe diem (or YOLO if you’re a stupid person) is a great motto. Don’t let opportunities pass you by, because although life is the longest thing you’ll ever experience, it goes by fast.
- You are in control – my parents have always given me excellent guidance but at a certain point you can’t live your life based on someone else’s idea of what your life should be. Surround yourself with people who will guide and advise you but give yourself permission to make the final decision.
- Forgive and let go – Probably the hardest lesson I’ve learned: the only person I can control is myself. When someone slights me, whether it’s big or small, I forgive them and forget. Don’t let someone live rent free in your head.
- Don’t define your limits – You (like the limit of f(x) = |x|/x as x approaches 0) are limitless (the limit doesn’t exist, is calculus humor still relevant?) You can never stop growing in your career, in your spirituality, in your sexuality, in your relationships, in yourself.
- Practice make perfect – a horrible cliche, I know, but it’s true, you cannot become a master without trying something over and over again. Period.
- Be thankful – there will always be people who have more than you and there will always be people who have less than you. Focus on what you have and give thanks.